Friday, May 01, 2009

When I Was a Boxing Bear


There was a period back in 80's when I boxed. I was the champion of all the land (in my mind at least). People were always down on my dream of becoming a champion bear, saying things like, "You are too old," or "You are too fat," or "I don't like you," or "Your teeth are so crooked it'd be great if you got punched in the mouth to straighten those suckers up" or "I hope you get knocked out because you deserve it for being such a terrible bear."

These things stuck with me, and fueled my fire. Fueling my fire was a good thing in many ways, as it was a cheap and affordable energy that I could use to not only heat my home but light my cigarettes.

People in the boxing business noticed my amazing skills, and dubbed me, "Great white bear who smokes a lot." I was truly flattered. And then I got flattened. Flattened by another bear, no less!

Gosh, the memories are just rushing back, searing my veins and bringing tears to my eyes... I want, I want to talk about this tragic fight, but the loss to this other bear, the memories still rumble through my brain and make me sink into the deepest of bear depressions.

The good thing about being a bear is that during these bouts of sadness I can go off and hibernate. Hibernating is very therapeutic, even for bears who are down and out on their luck!

7 comments:

laura b. said...

Hibernation has saved me more than once. I don't know what went wrong in your boxing career, but in that picture you look like a winner to me!

Tara said...

That drawing rocks, I like the red highlights.

Don't bears eat a bunch of stuff too, before they hibernate? I'm sure that would help sooth away the stress too. Eating and sleeping - yup, that would do it.

Sebastien said...

Laura: Thanks! I still feel like a winner (sometimes) :)

Tara: We do! Eating, especially after a long long hibernation is one of my favorite things to do. Love catching salmon in the rivers, that's good fun!

Zhu said...

Hibernation is a way of life in Canada. Nothing wrong with that... ;)

Very cute drawing!

Sebastien said...

You are so right, hibernation is the bestest!

daffy said...

I've spent all wekend trying to think of something both witty and topical... a pun on Ricky Hatton/Manny Pacquiao perhaps but nothing came to me. I decided to try and think of something related to boxing and hibernation... nothing... I had my hair cut at the weekend. *gasps* I may be like Samson! His strength was lost... maybe that's what has happened to my wit!

Sebastien said...

You had your roots done!

I would've loved to see Pacquiao, I hope they set up a fight with Mayweather.