Showing posts with label I smoked crack this morning. Show all posts
Showing posts with label I smoked crack this morning. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

The Scorpion

I know you all might have wondered what I did with that scorpion that terrorized us so much we had hallucinations, seizures, psychedelic nightmares... actually it was all pretty cool stuff!

No, I didn't do the logical thing and throw him away, set him on fire, put him on my sister's chair... I'm keeping him in this black cup, saving him for what will become his tragic destiny...

I'm going to do a painting of him (once I'm better of course!). The painting will be called, "The Greatest Painting Ever Because This Is a Painting of the Crazy Scorpion That Tried to Kill Me But He Failed Miserably And I Killed Him Well Actually My Dad Killed Him Because Basically He Wasn't a Perfectly Evolved Apex Predator Like the Great White Shark Is So Now He's My Bitch." I'm still tweaking the title.

My Little Scorpy, as I affectionately call him now, lies quietly and unperturbed in serene solitude... I hope his brothers and sisters don't figure out what ignominious masterplans I hold for him, they are liable to go crazy on me and decide to sting me to oblivion as I sleep the sweet sleep of the truly innocent.

Here is a picture of the vault where My Little Scorpy rests in peace till I bust him out for the painting. (Note to self: Might want to find a more secure location for this thing...)