Tuesday, November 14, 2006

The Scorpion

I know you all might have wondered what I did with that scorpion that terrorized us so much we had hallucinations, seizures, psychedelic nightmares... actually it was all pretty cool stuff!

No, I didn't do the logical thing and throw him away, set him on fire, put him on my sister's chair... I'm keeping him in this black cup, saving him for what will become his tragic destiny...

I'm going to do a painting of him (once I'm better of course!). The painting will be called, "The Greatest Painting Ever Because This Is a Painting of the Crazy Scorpion That Tried to Kill Me But He Failed Miserably And I Killed Him Well Actually My Dad Killed Him Because Basically He Wasn't a Perfectly Evolved Apex Predator Like the Great White Shark Is So Now He's My Bitch." I'm still tweaking the title.

My Little Scorpy, as I affectionately call him now, lies quietly and unperturbed in serene solitude... I hope his brothers and sisters don't figure out what ignominious masterplans I hold for him, they are liable to go crazy on me and decide to sting me to oblivion as I sleep the sweet sleep of the truly innocent.

Here is a picture of the vault where My Little Scorpy rests in peace till I bust him out for the painting. (Note to self: Might want to find a more secure location for this thing...)

17 comments:

glorious said...

If he is dead, how long will he last? Won't he start to, you know, get moldy soon? Yuck.

Sebastien said...

Crap, that's a really good point.

Well, insects don't tend to decay very quickly because of the substance they are made of, they aren't flesh and blood. I remember keeping a couple of wasps/hornets to draw (I didn't get a chance to actually do the drawings), but they held up for a long time!

Sonja said...

Put him in a ziploc bag and throw him in the freezer...a few months from now, VOILA! Instant paint subject!

Also, thanks for your kind words about my last post. I think we are BOTH rather amazing!!!!

MrManuel said...

I think you should stay with that title of the painting. It is short and to the point.

Babs said...

I love the label below.. "I smoked crack this morning."

Shaymus O'flatulence's Blog said...

I think it would make a nice earing ...well for a while till it started to smell.

Sebastien said...

Sonja: Genius advice! Why didn't I think of that!!!! Dude, we are so amazing it's not even funny.

Mrmanuel: Did I ever tell that "short and to the point because I'm always right so I don't have to use to many words to justify myself" is my middle name?

Babs: Haha, I'm glad you like that. Maybe I really should start doing that, the world would be a lot... uh, different I guess.

Mariana said...

I was so sure you were going to put the bugger in a bottle of vodka, or something like that (to get hallucinations whenever you drank it.) But drawing it is just as cool!

Sebastien said...

Shaymus: Haha, that is a wonderful idea! I love how your mind works.

Mariana: Oh my god! I never thought of doing that! I really need to have more hallucinations and that is the perfect way to have a bunch of 'em!

Shaymus O'flatulence's Blog said...

yes its rational irrationality

Jayne said...

I like the title, but I think you need to put some heavy books on that cup. I mean, just in case the little stinger's playing dead, you know? I think they regenerate... yeah, I saw that on, uhm, Animal Planet. The Amazing Regenerating Scorpion.

imhelendt said...

dude. uh I think you're losing it. :D

Sebastien said...

Shaymus: That is something I am all too familiar with!

Jayne: I knew it! I knew this thing would come back from the dead and jump on my face!!!!!!

Helen: Helen, I lost it a long long time ago.

Mr. Fabulous said...

I don't know much about art, but I know what I like!

Sebastien said...

Mr. Fab, I had a feeling you would dig a scorpion painting. I was thinking of doing a painting of a cookie in the toilet for you!

lindenksv said...

See, a normal person would think that keeping a scorpion in a cup is rather strange. I'm not one of those people :::shrug:::. I once caught a baby mouse and put him in a cup, too. But I was nicer...I gave him cheddar cheese...

Sebastien said...

Haha, so you were humane! Well, I'm glad to know you don't think I'm totally insane, only partially so and in a most benign way!