Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Debate? Bush vs. Ahmadinejad.


I am so happy. I just found a very funny article in which Ahmadinejad offers to debate George Bush. That would be fun. Pay per view. $50? I would pay.

Now, I think the Bush/Kerry debates showed us that debating has lost all sense of value in our day and age since everything is about gloss and spinning and looking good and having pretty teeth and all that(actually I didn't watch the debates but that's what I'll claim anyways because it works with what I'm saying). Look, if I've learned anything in my life, it's that looking really really good always beats out intelligence and moral uprightness. Always. If you look good you can get away with all the naughtiness you want, take a gander at our celebrities(oh how I love you dear celebrities!)

Now, we are in the 21st century. Since debates are so passe, I propose that they set a date and time for something cool and wacky, something postmodern. They should have a hot dog eating contest. I would propose a kung fu match, but that almost seems too bland, almost too befitting of my sense of humor. My inner American entrepreneurial spirit tells me we should do something better than a debate, because we could make WAAAY more money. Pay per view. $100, 200... We're all winners in this. Just keep brewing up a storm with Iran Bush, it'll be sweet, you're gonna make us a hell of a lot of money!! We just need to find the right postmodern money-making event to pit Ahmadinejad against George Bush.

Hopefully Bush doesn't blow this thing for us and decide he wants to just blow them up. We would lose a whole heck of a lot of potential earnings and profits if he did such a thing. I'm not a fricking weapons contractor, I'm an entertainer. There is no entertainment value in just blowing these people up, the only ones that win with that are the aforementioned weapons contractors and the news networks.

Verbal sparring, ratcheting up of tensions, it's fun, sort of like the Cuban missile crisis. Boy, those were the good old days when we didn't know if a 3rd world country might blow us up with Russian supplied nukes. Well, I guess all we have to worry about today are rogue terrorist groups with no borders and lots of resources.

I forgot what I was trying to say, hehe... I don't think I had much of a point except I thought the debate idea was kind of funny.

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